Sleep is for the weak

I think that if there is one thing other parents failed to fully describe to me before I had kids I'd say that it was easily the lack of sleep and utter exhaustion. Now that we're pretty much past the really, really tough part (knock on fake wood desk) I am able to look back on it and talk about it without breaking down into a puddle of tears and exhaustion. Seriously, yes, it's that bad. And no, i don't have any sort of post-partum depression stuff to deal with, sometimes you just cry because you're tired and it's all you have left.


There are a few things I really hated other parents to say to me. One is "enjoy this time, it goes so fast..." another is "are you going to try for a girl" and the real kicker is "just sleep when he sleeps". I'll kill you is what I said to those people. It's possible that was just in my head though, who knows...those first few weeks are a walking zombie-like experience where you are half awake and half asleep. Allow me a few moments to comment on the "sleep when he sleeps" genius. Ok, let's say that I start feeding Noah at noon. He takes 40 minutes or so to eat and another 10 for me to firmly, but lovingly, urge a burp out of him so that he doesn't spew 40 minutes of milk out of his little mouth and nose. Ten minutes later, he's asleep and now I get to pump. So, twenty minutes later he wakes up with a blowout of a diaper. Another ten minutes have passed while I've changed that first diaper only to have him realize that he wasn't quite done crapping the minute the new diaper touches his body. Two diapers gone now. While I calculate the cost of diapers in my head time continues to fly by. Ten more minutes to calm down from hating having his diaper changed and he's finally back to sleep. After ten minutes of sleep he starts to writh in pain which I finally deduce is horrible gas. Finally a monster fart appears and he falls back to sleep. Well guess what? it's now been over 2 hours and he's due to eat again. Just try and work in time there for showering, peeing, and laundry...yes laundry because babies, especially boys go through 3-4 onesies a day sometimes. They have magical pee powers I tell you. Anyway, that's my sleep schedule rant.


But then suddenly, you wake up in the middle of the night and realize it's been 5 hours since you last fed him. You check and verify that yes, he's still alive and relish the thought that you may actually get to sleep through the night again soon. It's a good thought. Then he wakes up and you start the show all over again, but it's still good. Because it's true what all the annoying parents out there say, they really do grow up so fast. So you enjoy it because the sleepless nights won't last forever, they'll be gone before you know it and you'll have all new things to get crazy emotional about.


Night, Night Everyone!! The Barnes household is heading for bed...and hopefully for several hours :)

ahhh, but they are just so cute when they sleep :)