Surreal doesn't even begin to explain how this feels tonight. It's 10pm and I need to be wraping up the night and heading to bed...because our alarm is set for 4am-a disgusting hour if you ask me. At four, we'll stumble out of bed. Jeff will stumble; I'll do the roll onto my right side and let my body slide out of bed move that I've perfected over the last several weeks because any movement more aggressive than that just doesn't happen at this point. So right now I've revisited the hospital bag I've packed over the last few weeks, which is fortunate because I discovered that I had packed two pairs of pj pants and zero tops. Now, there are 4 shirts in there which is overkill, but at least I'll have options. Another surreal thing...not having a clue what will fit you in one, two, three and four days. Last time I packed a hospital bag I planned on being in the hospital approximately 24 hours...not four days. Quite different when you are there that long. You need toiletries and other junk. Then add to it packing stuff for Noah and we've got some serious baggage sitting in our rooom.
Back to surreal...we know what will happen tomorrow but it doesn't take away any of the weirdness of all the planning and prep work that we've done so far. So strange to have this super important, miraculous event nailed down to the day and hour of our choosing. We'll report to the hospital at 5am and I should be in surgery at 7 as long as I don't get bumped and there aren't any other delays. Once Noah is out, I'll get to see him and then Jeffrey will get to go down to the nursery with him and show him off to the family while I'm still in surgery. I have no idea how much time is added to my surgery because I'm getting my tubes tied, though I can't imagine it's very much. After that, I'll head to recovery where I think I stay for a few hours. Then, I'll be moved to my postpartum room where I'll stay for the rest of our time there. Anyway, that's how we think it goes...last time was such an unexpected blur so we barely remember it. This time just feels so planned, but I still feel like there are way, way too many balls in the air right now.
I think that tomorrow morning when I wake up at the ass crack of dawn, I'll do my hair. I'll even put on some mascara and lipgloss - maybe some color to my cheeks. Hell, the result has GOT to be better than this, right? :)
We dropped Connor off with Grammy & Papa Barnes tonight and it was kinda bittersweet. I asked him who he was going to get to meet tomorrow and he immediately said Baby Noah. I can't even fathom what it's going to be like for him to visit us at the hospital tomorrow and throughout the weekend...to see me in the hospital bed all folded over and broken-like. I think I'm more worried about it than I need to be, but I just don't want to scare him.
Well, it's 10:30 and I'm going to lay down. Tomorrow will fly by and I'm hoping Jeffrey catches most of it in pictures for us! I asked him tonight if he's comfortable using the camera. He looked at me in a very annoyed way, so I'm going with a Yes. Good night everyone - we'll have updates as soon as we're able to so stay tuned!
Love,
The Barnes Family of 4 - Jeff, Linds, Connor and Noah!
2 comments:
It's 8:20 here which means, if all is going as planned, you're in surgery right now, maybe Noah is being born...like NOW!? Anxiously awating your calls and texts.
Yay!! Saw the FB updates, so happy for you! And Noah is bigger than they estimated right?
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