Friday, August 17, 2012

This should have stayed in my Draft folder...

(warning: boring post ahead. I kept waiting for it to take an exciting turn and it truly just didn't happen. the only reason it didn't die in my draft folder is because it's really long. so to summarize...boring AND long.)

Hello my name is Lindsay and I am a nail biter.

WAS a nail biter.

True story. After 30 years of biting my nails, I quit. quit! I wasn't just a nibbler, I was eating those things like a starving orphan person. I have small hands and small nail beds and I would chew them down to nothing. they didn't even bleed anymore because they were just accustomed to the abuse and gave up.

My nails were just so gross and sad looking. I'd gaze longingly at the ladies getting manicures and thing...there's nothing to paint on my sad little hands. Plus, putting paint on my stubs would only draw attention to their sadness. People said, just paint them and then you won't bite them. Not true sir. I just ate the polish right off. Buy that nasty tasting stuff so you won't bite them. Nope. I powered through that crap until i couldn't taste it anymore.

In April, my bestie Shelley told me that if I stop biting my nails she'd give me manicures with her amazing gel system she bought. Seriously, she owns one just like the ones in the nail salons. I'm a pedicure fan and I'd always hide my nails when getting my toes done. the shame...

I don't know how, but I literally quit biting my nails that night after making my deal with Shelley. Somehow even though I'd literally tortured them for three decades, my nails grew fast and they grew nice. The whites were super white and my nails were strong. I was thrilled. They are thick and healthy against all odds. I feel like some druggie who wrecked my body for years and then managed to kick out a healthy baby. Not the same? Fine.

So I have nails now. It's been about 4 months and I'm in love/lust with it. For several weeks I annoyed close friends with pictures of my nail growth. Can you imagine anything more boring? You get a text or email from a friend and you see there's a photo. Oh fun you think. What's Lindsay sending me? BAM. it's a picture of my nails. what a letdown. I was cleaning out all my cell pictures and realized I had something like 20 photos of my nails. what a weirdo.

I've become obsessed with painting my nails. Obsessed. I'm even pretty good now at painting my right hand which was a shit show at the beginning. I'm kinda boring though (much like this blog post). I have maybe 9 different shades of light pink. I've always been kinda boring classic with nail polish but I keep wanting to try fun stuff. I get to the nail place every time i get a manicure and i'm just overwhelmed with all the options.

I see all these fun colors and immediately get concerned that they will clash with my clothes. Does that count?  After gazing at the options, i'll get all dazed and inevitably end up choosing a neutral.
colors i want to get
boring neutral i end up selecting

I think I'm going to get mint green next time I go.  I promise.  Clashing be damned!!  Hold me to it readers!! What's your go-to polish color??


Jeni Lyn said...

RED! ...and I loved this post! Laughed all the way through it! hehe! and I am proud of you.

Krista said...

I loved it too! I had no idea. :) I never paint my finger nails because it wears off too fast and I get pissed. I always paint my toe nails all sorts of fun colors. Just bought 4 new polishes today!